2002-03-03 - 4:34 a.m.

This is not a normal, Google laden entry.

I have spent the last two hours cleaning out the submissions book, and I am not anywhere near done. Because of this, I felt the need to start adding new rules and making some clarifications regarding this site.

Some new rules:

1) Don't even bother submitting if your diary is passworded or you intend to password it in the near future. Entries submitted from passworded diaries are deleted without exception. Since this site is a combination of humor and catering to hit whores, it's really pointless to submit a site we can't access.

2) If you DID password your diary, please drop us a line in the guestbook or via e-mail. While we'll be checking diaries before putting them in entries, it will be a big help if you can forewarn us, especially if you have a great whopping load of entries in the submissions book. Then we can just go through and delete them in one fell swoop.

3) Don't submit something multiple times. That, quite frankly, annoys the piss out of me and is likely to make me delete EVERY SUBMISSION YOU HAVE MADE IN THE BOOK. We are slow. This site is updated on a "feel-like-it-and-have-time" basis. If your submission doesn't appear within a week, it's probably because we just didn't update, for crying out loud.

Right.

Some little clarifications:

1) Not all submissions that include the word "poop" are odd. "Poop in a jar," that's odd. "poop pictures" is not--it's just infantile.

2) Not all submissions with sexual references are odd. "Incidentally fuck wacky inflatable 18 year old Brit woman," that is so odd I can't even begin to tell you how odd it is. As for "i fucked my grandma pictures," well, it's been done already, it's not odd anymore, and you don't need to submit it.

3) Some of the entries I, Belle, personally like the most are the ones where the searcher is apparently using Google as a therapy tool. Like, "i think i'm an alcoholic and depressed."

4) When submitting, think like this: Does it make you laugh uproariously, or does it instantly bring to mind some snappy comeback? If so, it's probably perfect Oddgoogle material, since those are the criteria I base selection on. Some things may be odd, but still boring. Try to not submit the odd but boring ones. Certain diarists, like Goovie, were great at picking Oddgoogles that really caught our attention.

5) Please. No more eating disorder references. Personal issues aside, we've already done a couple of these, and don't need to do any more.

6) Actually, in general, if you think you've seen it on this site, don't submit it. If you want to double check, that's what the search tool is for. Search the site and make sure what you're about to submit is fresh and new. "Fact check your butt" is new and fresh. "XXX animal porn?" Not new and fresh.

I hope you find these guidelines helpful. They're designed to help you pick the perfect Oddgoogle to be featured; remember, all Oddgoogles are credited and linked to the diarist who got hit with them! Make your brush with fame a good one.